The 12th of April

My world came crashing down on this day..all my hopes and my dreams. When I got the news while sitting in the chair at the beauty shop, I felt like I was floating above everyone else looking down on some horrible nightmare taking place. I could not speak, I could barely breathe. It felt like someone was sitting on my chest. This is the day that I found out that my husband of 14 years had cheated on me. Words can not express the hurt and the pain that I felt and that I am still feeling. I have cried, yelled, hit, cursed..you name it..I have had every emotion possible. I pray that NO ONE will ever have to experience this pain. I am praying for healing, restoration, and forgiveness. God forgives us all the time when we sin him so I need to be able to do the same. I pray for my husband..the turmoil that must be in his heart right now, I can't even imagine. I would just ask you all to please keep my whole family in your prayers. It is going to be a long road to recovery but I am willing to start the process.

Change

change can happen when you get the chance, change can happen without a passing glance, change can change everything in your path, change is the resistance to the things in the past, change is what people have to do to make their lives good. Happy Monday to you all!!!!

Anxiety and change

For some, change is so unsettling and can be quite traumatic. For me…well...I should be used to it. I went to a different school every year of high school and in my senior year I went to three...yes, you read correctly…three different schools. I grew up saying "I will never marry someone in the ministry." HA!! Does God have a sense of humor or what? When I married my hubby, he was a soldier, still a very unsettling career choice, especially due to the type of soldier he was. Then the Lord said…"Never say never my dear.". Here we are in the ministry for over almost 13 years now. My husband is on the pastoral team of a wonderful church with wonderful team members and we have been at this place for four years now. About two months ago I was approached by my former manager where I temped for almost three months. She wanted me to consider coming back to work as a permanent employee. At this time our two year A.R.M. turned into an adjustable rate mortgage because we could not sell or refinance due to the housing slump. I tried for a long time to get the job where I was currently, and to think about making another job change...all I have to say is it caused a lot of sleepless nights. I just wanted someone to make the decision for me, but I knew that was not going to happen. My husband said that he would support whatever decision I made. So here I am, three weeks into my decision and I have to say, I really feel confident that I made the right choice for my family. I feel like God gave this job to me at the right time. As unsettling as it was for me to make that decision and to think that people might look at me like I was crazy for changing jobs again, I know that it was the right thing for my family.

The Flu that hit home

So My daughter comes home from school with a bad headache and acting extremely tired, I just contributed it to being tired and told her to take a bath and she might feel better. While she is taking her bath I am watching the news with my hubby and they were talking about how bad the influenza is right now in VA and I said wow I am so glad our girls have not caught this nasty virus (those who know my girls know the battle we have had with my oldest being sick a lot) Savannah comes down the stairs and she looks HORRIBLE! I checked her temp and it was 102.5...in an hour time it spiked to that. Her temp has been staying around 103-104. The ironic thing is I have been reading a book about the Influenza pandemic of 1918. Pretty scary stuff...I hope and pray that you all stay healthy!!

Hmmm let's see

Here is a quick run down of some of my thoughts lately and some other happenings.... -I had a big decision to make this past week I prayed and prayed for over 2 weeks..FINALLY made a decision!! -Why do I so despise opinionated people when I can be so opinionated myself. -Why does it drive me raging mad when others complain about how busy they are??? Don't they know that we are ALL busy in some way or another...Come on it is Northern VA, we all have jobs and other extra things that we do.... I just don't feel the need to bitch about it. -My kids fighting...AHHHHH just shoot me!! -LOST! What is up with it?? What are your thoughts on this? I keep telling myself I will quit watching but I just can't! I am currently seeking help :) -I just can't seem to get my house organized! too much stuff and not enough room. -Adjustable rate mortgage...Just shoot me again!! -Now to a positive....friendships! God has given me some really great friends....muuuuaaahhhhh to you all!!! Ok..that's all for now :)

The sound of steam and 2008

Awww the sound of steam coming out of our new cappuccino maker....mmmm..I have developed a new weakness (thanks Doeblers) :) I've been having fun playing around with this cool little gadjet, trying to make the perfect cappuccino, I think I finally mastered it. May sound a little crazy that I can get so thrilled over the littlest thing, but it's so much fun!!! so if you all see me zipping around like a wild women you will know that I have had too many. We had a great time visiting family and friends in Georgia and Florida. We went back and forth a lot but it was worth it. I got a chance to see my oldest sister who I have seen one other time in like 6 or 7 years. I realized while I was there how much I really miss my sisters. We have had our share of ups and downs but NOTHING beats that close bond you get with sisters. So if you are reading this Donna and Kellie...I love you and miss you all already. I have so much that I want to accomplish in 2008.... -I want to be more organized..you organized people out there..HELP! how do you do it?? -to be a better mom..girls already think I'm great but I know I can improve so much more -to broaden my cooking abilities..I love to cook but get stuck with cooking the same ole same ole -to be a better friend....I want to reach out to new people to welcome them in and develop new relationships -to be more diligent in my bible reading and personal time with God. -to be a better blogger..ha..those who read my blogs probably already know I pretty much stink at blogging, not very creative I know! -Of course the old "I want to loose weight" seriously though...I want to concentrate on a healthy life style, exercising, healthy food choices and if loosing weight comes with it then WHOO HOO! There is so much more but I will not bore you with the rest. I look forward to seeing what 2008 brings.